Eye of the Beholder

Over the past two days, my eyes have been exposed to such unimaginable natural beauty it cannot be expressed... no words could describe it... no photograph could capture it... no painting could impart even a fraction of the awe-inspiring splendor I have seen since Sunday. The best I can hope to accomplish in this blog is to explain to you where I have been.

Yesterday, the wide open plains of Missouri. A rolling ocean of open land as far as the eye can see... interrupted only by thousands of hay bails for miles upon miles.

The Badlands of South Dakota... some parts are a surreal, Dr. Seuss land of water-eroded peaks and plateaus with tufts of pale green grass-hair. We rented a cabin in the park but it turned out they gave us the wrong key and we were forced to camp outside. Far, far away from the lights of any city, in the absence of any moon at all... truly the darkest, most silent night I have ever experienced. In this profound absence of light, I saw more stars than I have ever seen. A faint, milky band of light seemed to divide the sky in two. Dad explained we were actually seeing the plain of our galaxy on edge... I had always heard people talk about the milky way but I really had no concept of it... Last night, I could actually visualize looking out across the unfathomably vast galactic plain of stars from our tiny little spec of a planet... billions of people living on a single grain of sand amidst a million billion square miles of desert dunes. It was almost scary to look up and see so much vastness above my head.

This morning, we found ourselves in the Black Hills where Mount Rushmore is carved. The monument itself is impressive, of course, but pales in comparison to the mountains themselves. We followed the narrow, winding road as it led past one breathtaking vista after another.

Driving on from the Black Hills into Wyoming late afternoon, we found ourselves winding through Big Horn National Forest not long before sunset. The truck had a seriously tough time pulling the trailer up and over this 14K+ foot mountain range but it was worth it. Actually, I'd say the entire 3500-mile road trip was worth this 1-hour drive through the Big Horn mountains. I cannot even begin to describe the awe-inspiring beauty of these mountains. It's one thing to see a mountain range off in the distance and appreciate their beauty, but it's an entirely different thing to actually drive through them! One thing I never imagined... amidst the dense green forest were patches of trees on which every leaf had turned a vivid yellow. The low, golden sun seemed to light these trees with the most spectacularly vibrant flaming yellow brilliance I have ever seen... I'm not exaggerating this... I mean it was gut-wrenching!

Once over the top of the range, it was a steep downhill roll for literally 10 miles. With the engine in neutral, I had to ride the brakes continuously to keep my speed below 70 MPH! Just when I thought I had already seen the most beautiful thing in the world, we came out of the Big Horn mountains heading west just as the sun was setting behind the hilly, mountainous horizon. For another 30 minutes or so, we seemed to be chasing the sunset as it tried to hide behind the hills. Thick rays of sunshine seemed to shoot out over the hills in front of us... each time we crested another hill, a brilliant green valley opened up and it felt like we were almost catching up to the sun... but not quite... we'd then roll down into the shadow of yet another hill... and the sun slipped a little further away.

By then, it was all too much for both of us, my dad and me. We had run out of words. We drove on in silence, into the sunset, and I found it difficult to see without wiping the moisture away from my eyes.

About Brian

So far, the 1400 miles we've driven seems to be fairly easy going. I drove yesterday almost the entire day... something like 12 hours or more. I was fine in daylight but once the sun went down, I was suddenly and intensely sleepy. I just could not help it. I might have been the fact that I had driven 12 hours already... or the 3 or 4 caffeinated drinks might have contributed... In any case, I had to give in and let dad drive the last half-hour to Columbia, Missouri.

Once we checked in a got into the room, I was feeling pretty dead. But Brian had other ideas. Having spent those 12 hours in his cage behind the driver seat, he was flying... literally bounding off the walls and the furniture and everything else in sight. If only we had a little red jump suite for him, he might have been a character from The Incredibles! He ran the length of the room and jumped up on the high bed and then leaped across 5 feet to the other bed and then down and then up and down and up and down and up... he'd run and jump and then repel off the wall to get up higher like one of those kung fu movies! With wings, his little tail could be a propeller!

Anyway... you get the idea. By the end of each day, Brian the super pup is ready to race fighter jets with intent to win. Amazingly enough, though, he's really good all day otherwise. He wimpers only once in a long while in the back. Most of the time he's so quiet I have sudden fears that we might have accidentally left him behind somewhere. Everywhere we go, people love him... but the point of all this is to say that I love him.

Big Ass Fan

So we've just completed the second full day of driving and I believe we've made excellent progress. Over about 1,400 miles, we've passed through Florida (obviously), Georgia, Tennessee, Kentucky, Illinois, and we're now in Missouri. Tennessee has had the most interesting terrain so far and some very cool bridges... sorry no pictures of those. Somewhere along the way, we stopped in gas station that has a food court... it's called Cheers. Inside, about 30 feet up, was a big ass ceiling fan about 18 feet in diameter. Now think about that... the largest ceiling fan I ever saw was about 60" and this one is roughly 216" ! The first thing I said when I saw it was "wow... that's a big ass fan!" Funny thing is, upon a closer look, I discovered the company that made it is call Big Ass Fans... and their logo is actually the ass-end of a donkey. :-)

The rig

One star for OnStar

So we're back on the road again with only a few very short hours of
sleep. Rather than dig out brian's kennel, I decided to give him a
chance to prove he can be trusted sleeping on the bed with me without
causing trouble... Well, he settled down ok but at 7:30 this morning
he heard someone leaving the room next door and bolted upright. In the
process, he kicked me pretty hard in the neck and a torrent of
coughing and choking ensued... No going back to sleep after that!

Anyway, while dad is driving, I thought I'd make a few comments about
the new rig. It's big. It's red. It came with something called OnStar.
It's supposed to envelope my truck in a magic field of goodness with
emergency services, GPS navigation, and even a satelite telephone
using prepaid minutes. The whole thing is voice activated after
pressing a button on the mirror. It all sounds wonderful but the nice
computer lady seems to have trouble understanding English. Perhaps she
was programed in a foreign country and expects me to speak with a
heavy accent. The GPS navigation isn't much more impressive. When you
ask for directions you actually do get a live human being from
somewhere inside the OnStar ship. I suspect these people may not
actually live on earth, though, because they never seem to know much
about the place I'm trying to find. Driving last night I asked to find
any pet friendly hotel near the Florida turnpike... The only
suggestion we got from our human OnStar drone was a motel six almost
30 miles out of the way. After three fairly useless tries, I feel I'd
probably have better luck carrying a copy of the yellow pages with me
everywhere. At this point, I'd say OnStar is OffStar in my book.

Incidentally, dad's driving scares the he'll out of me. It's probably
a good thing I'm distracted typing this blog on my iPhone. He's
already given me heart troubles more than once with his last-second
lane changes to catch a gas station entrance without having to turn
around. Normally, I'd be only a little terrified, but this time we're
hauling what equates to a consumer-level big-rig. Roller coasters fun
but only in theme parks.

Off to a slow start...

First off, let me say hello to everyone who may be reading this. I've added about 10 people to an email list who receive a notice when I post a new blog entry. The list is limited to 10, so if you know anyone who would like to be notified of new postings, please pass it along.

So... I had originally imagined that I would have all my stuff packed in the 5x8 uhaul trailer and ready to tow by the time my father arrived at Fort Lauderdale airport on Monday night. Yes, this past monday, the 22nd. Believe it or not, I was actually concerned about getting through the airport to pick up my dad with the trailer in tow. Ha. I had no idea.

Long story short, I was not ready by Monday. I was not ready by tuesday. On wednesday, with the trailer not yet full, having already shipped 32 boxes, I realized that my wonderful Mazda 3 was simply incabable of towing even this small trailer 3500 miles to Seattle. Actually, it could barely reach 60 mph on a flat highway in Florida. So I frantically considered options. My first thought was to rent an SUV to tow the trailer and ship my car. Every single car rental company forbid me to tow anything with one of their vehicles. I looked into a number of other options too, but rather than bore you with the details, I'll skip it and tell you I traded in my lovable Mazda 3 for a new Chevy Silverado pickup capable of towing almost 11000 pounds. Beleive it or not, this was actually the most cost effective option... and it was mom's idea!

So... Fastforward to Thursday night... I'm packing the last of the trailer with the laughable beleif that I would have no problem fitting what was left of my belongings into the truck bed with the dog enjoying a roomy backseat in the cab with me. I say it was a laughable beleif because, even with the truck packed to the ceiling and the bed requiring considerable finese to close the rolling top, I still had to ship another 13 boxes and leave a bunch of other crap behind. By the time 11:00 PM rolled around, I was still figuring out what I was taking and leaving, cramming loose socks and sheets and pillows into every available crevice. At this point, my dad and I were just so tired of getting ready to leave that I started thinking like someone trying to escape from a burning building... what would you take?

Anway, we finally pulled away at 11:45 and called mom in Colorado to let her know we were on the road. 25 minutes later, I realized I had left an envelope of cash (a LOT of cash!) on the kitchen counter! I cursed and turned around.

It's now 4:35 AM, Friday the 26th, 5 days after I had imagined leaving and I'm blogging from my La Quinta hotel room and reflecting on a fairly important lesson learned from just the begining of this experience...

Never underestimate the amount of crap a man can aquire when provided with the space to store it. After first getting rid of nearly every piece of furniture I own, half of my clothes, old computer equipment, seldom used photography equipment, and shipping a grand total of 45 boxes, I still had more than I could fit into a huge extended cab pickup truck towing a 5x8 trailer. I think I'll begin concentrating on keeping less. Otherwise, I don't think I could ever move again.